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Old 12-28-2012, 03:23 AM   #1
pineranch
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Humor

Ramblings of a Retired Mind
I was thinking about how a status symbol of today is those cell phones that everyone has clipped onto their belt or purse. I seldom need one. So, I'm wearing my garage door opener, also made a cover for my hearing aid and now I have what they call blue teeth, I think.

You know, I spent a fortune on deodorant before I realized that people didn't like me anyway.

I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans!

I was thinking about old age and decided that old age is 'when you still have something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce it.

I thought about making a fitness movie for folks my age, and call it 'Pumping Rust

I've gotten that dreaded furniture disease. That's when your chest is falling into your drawers!

When people see a cat's litter box, they always say, 'Oh, have you got a cat?' Just once I want to say, 'No, it's for company!

Employment application blanks always ask who is to be notified in case of an emergency. I think you should write, 'A Good Doctor!'

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older. Then, it dawned on me; they were cramming for their finals.

As for me, I'm just hoping God grades on the curve.

Enjoy Your Days and Love Your Life, because Life is a journey to be savored.
Happy New Year,
Mike
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Old 12-28-2012, 04:50 AM   #2
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Funny, Thanks!
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Old 12-28-2012, 07:22 AM   #3
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:-)
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Old 12-28-2012, 07:24 AM   #4
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Loved them. Humor is a wonderful thing.
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Old 12-28-2012, 10:59 AM   #5
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:-) Good stuff, Mike! LOL !!!
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Old 12-28-2012, 01:36 PM   #6
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Thanks for the good laugh.
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Old 12-28-2012, 01:57 PM   #7
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Love it, I am going to use a few of those.
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Old 12-28-2012, 07:35 PM   #8
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Now that's funny, thanks!
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Old 12-29-2012, 12:08 AM   #9
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Posessing a sense of humor is one of the most important things a human can have. W/O it we just seem to fail in so many ways as we go through life.
You sir are a gifted man...thank you for making me smile.
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Old 12-29-2012, 02:13 AM   #10
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Thanks Mike. Not only funny but parts of it are true! Happy New Year, Jim
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Old 12-29-2012, 04:20 AM   #11
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Good one Mike, thanks for the laughs!

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Old 12-29-2012, 05:30 AM   #12
Steve and Susie
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Thanks for the laughs Mike, anddddddddd, helping me understand some things that go along with my age--lol. As for the furniture disease, I'm wishing my chest wouldn't have been so big, my drawers wouldn't have to be so large now. Happy Trails, Steve and Susie
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Old 12-29-2012, 06:44 AM   #13
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