Tool Definitions

[indy roadrunner]

There are times in the MOC Maintenance forum that we mention use of certain tools. For the ladies benefit, I thought I might define some of those tools for you.
Drill Press: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest causing you to knock your beverage across the room covering a freshly painted part.

Wire Wheel: Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes skin from your fingers leaving no fingerprints and also useful for removing guitar calluses in about the time it takes to say "Ouch".

Electric Hand Drill: Normally used for spinning pop rivets in their holes. It usually has a dead battery right before you need to use it.

Pliers: Used to round off bolt heads.

Vise-Grips: Another useful tool for rounding off bolt heads with the added advantage of being used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand catching the bandages on fire that you put on your hand when using the wire wheel.

Hacksaw: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle. It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more your attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.

Welding Torch: Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable objects in the shop, also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub you want the bearing grease out of.

Phill & Gladys
Sometimes me sits and thinks - sometimes me just sits.
06 GMC 2500HD Duramax 4x4
06 Montana 3400RL
Bichon - CEO

[txkrumm]

Here is a very Broad definition.
"Everything is a hammer, except a screwdriver and thats a chisel."

Steve and Tara Krumm
2004 GMC 4X4 Duramax Allison
2003 Montana 3655 FL

[Ozz]

Phill,
I was nodding my head so much, I looked like a Woodpecker!
Cute and true, made us all laugh.
I'm a big fan of Murphey's law.
Ozz

'07 3400RL 2nd RTU
2 Golf Cart batteries 3,000 watt inverter, automatic transfer switch
Honda 2000 Generator, Maytag's with 220 Dryer
Stationary domed Sat. dish, LCD 12 Volt Amp gauge, LCD Tank Monitor
3 added 120 volt outlets, On Board Air; 12 Volt Viair 450C compressor
2006 Ford PSD 4x4 Off Road Lariat, Hadley Air Horns, Truck inverter with 110 volts: laptop, Color Backup camera, Firestone air bags,Husky air ride roller hitch, Awning lock

[SAndreasen]

Unfortunatly I can relate to all of them! The scares on my fingers hurt at the thought.


Steve & Sharon Andreasen
Cherokee, IA
2003 315RLS TT
2002 2500HD Chevy 8.1/AT

"Every thing I've seen teaches me to trust the Creator for that which I have not seen."Apollo Astronauts/Emerson