New House, Texas, and Flying vs. Driving - Montana Owners Club

Wayne and Carolyn Mathews · 06-25-2008, 06:58 AM

Our stick home is finally finished except that all the granite has to be replaced because of a nice/nasty surprise that the clever installers left for us to find after they left (and when we were gone for the day).

Nice: We love the way the color and pattern (Wild West Green) looked in our cabin-style house.

Nasty: The cracks that I guess we were not suppposed to notice. In addition to four long ones in the main counter areas, one entire corner of the breakfast bar, a triangle-shaped piece measuring 24" by 24" by 26", had apparently broken off in transit and been glued back to the main section. The installers tried to make it work. NOT. Every crack goes completely through the granite, too. We'll have to live with the damage until the new granite arrives. Our builder had a fit--not with us when we refused to accept the installation, but with the granite guys. (RVs, home construction--it does pay to have a good dealer!)

We close at 10 in the morning. Instead of moving in, however, we go from the closing in Dillon to a hotel in Bozeman to spend the night because we have an early-morning flight to Austin Friday. Wayne's mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's in late March and within weeks has become combative and unmanageable. We arranged in-home health care for her, but within 2 weeks it was obvious that even with 24/7 supervision, she needed to be in an Alzheimer's facility. The first nursing home she was in booted her out in less than a week, and now two more nursing homes have refused to take her. She's been admitted to an Alzheimer's/Dementia unit in a local hospital for treatment until we can arrive. So, we're headed to Texas to see what kind of solution we can find. Bringing here up here isn't an option; she's 96 and her doctor says making the 1800 mile trip is out of the question, even if we had aides to accompany her. Also, the nearest facility that accepts Alzheimer's patients is over 3 hours from us, and even that home might refuse to take her. We were told by a hospital staff therapist that in Texas, the demand for places in nursing homes is at such an all-time high that the homes can pick and choose the kinds of patients they want. Taking on a combative, uncooperative patient is something they don't have to do.

We'd planned to drive, camping in our Montana and enjoying some of our favorite places such as the Wind River Canyon, the Black Canyon of the Gunnison, Taylor Lake, etc., along the way. But, after we figured the cost of diesel on a 3600-mile round-trip, we decided to check air fares. Lo and behold, we found round-trip tickets from Bozeman to Austin for $354 each (plus tax). That is a lot cheaper than driving. On the bright side, we'll have more time in Texas with our family there, even though we won't be able to show off our new Monty. Another "bright side" is that rally now being planned for June of 2009 in Oregon.

We will take the Montana west for that, so giving up the Texas drive is a bit easier!

I'll suffer MOC withdrawal beginning tomorrow because I'll have no internet access until July 9th. There's a bright side to that, too: I'll have a lot of good stuff to read when I return.
Carolyn

Icehouse · 06-25-2008, 07:40 AM

We will be praying for y'all as you head to Texas to deal with this. Have a safe flight and remember you have a brand new house to move into when you get home!

Mrs. CountryGuy · 06-25-2008, 08:22 AM

Whew, that is a lot of stuff on your plate at one time. We wish you only the best.

Congrats on the new house.

Prayers for you on the rest of it.

Take care.

Wayne and Carolyn Mathews · 06-25-2008, 07:15 PM

Thanks--prayers and good wishes are appreciated. I know we have a battle on our hands; the nursing home called earlier and told us Clara was out of control again tonight. Every call like that is another strike against her staying there. If she knew what she was going through, she would be mortified. She was the epitome of the little plump, gray-haired, pink cheeks, twinkling blue eyes mother and grandmother until Alzheimer's took over her brain and body.

The house was cleaned today, so we are able to lock it and leave in the morning without worrying that we had to leave it open for 2 weeks. It was hard tonight--looked at the house, looked at the Monty, looked at the house, looked at the Monty. Now that we've once again been reminded that every day of good health is a gift from God, we are more eager than ever to do what it takes to get on the road and enjoy life while we can.

Yes, we are spending our children's inheritance! (They're ok with it, thank goodness--except that the fight is already on for who gets the trailer. Shameful, those grown kids of mine!

Wayne and Carolyn

Ozz · 06-26-2008, 01:22 AM

Wow, such highs and lows. I know how happy you are about the house being completed, and how painful it is coping with the horrible disease your mom has. I went through it with my dad, it's so sad. Our thoughts will be with you.

Driftwoodgal · 06-26-2008, 04:49 AM

Carolyn,

So sorry to hear about Wayne's mother. I don't know what we can do to help out, but we will be back in Driftwood/Austin on July 8th. Let us know if we can help you out, or just need to get together with someone and let off some steam.

Colleen

PS Prayers are with all of you.

Jay Bird · 06-26-2008, 08:10 AM

So sorry to hear you mother has alzheimers. We went thru the same thing with my mother.She turned into someone we did not know. She was the person that everyone wanted for their mother. We did not know this person who was fighting us and saying things that would hurt. Just remember that she does not know what is going on around her. We lost my mother this past April. The memories I have of her are of the good days. I have forgotten the days she would make me cry. That was not her. My prayers are with you and your family. And from what I see in the MOC group you will be in a lot prayers.
Rosetta

boylanag · 06-26-2008, 08:38 AM

You are in our thoughts and prayers. We have gone through that wicked, evil disease with loved ones and know some of the pain that you have.

richfaa · 06-27-2008, 03:29 PM

We went through Alzheimer's with my Father.We understand..Alheimers is a cruel disease. We hope your State has facilities designed for Alzheimer's' folks. My Dad lived in Pennsylvania and that State has such facilities. Nursing homes could not care for him.

Tiffensdad · 07-08-2008, 03:08 AM

Our prayers are with you as you go through your trials, may the high spots offset the lows. Alzhiemers is a terrible disease that not only robs us of our loved one, but frequently destroys our good memories because of the present behavior. Having spent years around the disease we have learned that one of the most important things is to remember that the victim is no longer the person they were and we need to keep from letting this 'new person' influance our thoughts and feelings for them. Some years back an Alzhimer patient who still had lucid moments told DW that for him his entire life was now like coming in to the middle of a movie and leaving before the end, he never knew what was going on around him and when he had the next lucid moment everything was different.
Best wishes to you, enjoy the new house and move that Monty on frequent and long trips...

eeoski · 07-11-2008, 02:25 PM

Wayne and Carolyn,

We are so sorry to hear about your mother/mother-in-law and hope that you are able to find a place where she can receive the care and compassion that she deserves DESPITE the affect this disease has had on her personality. Our thoughts and prayers are with you all!

Robin and Doug

**Rondo** · 07-11-2008, 07:21 PM

Wayne and Carolyn,
God's speed to you on your trip to Texas and God's blessings on you and your loved ones while you are there and on your return trip home. May you find the joys of the memories of the past and look forward to the memories in the future and may you be given courage and wisdom to endure the times to come! You will be in our prayers!

Ron and Mary

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