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Sooner or later we all get to this place with our parents. It is not easy but in looking back, (both my parents passed away in 2001), you can feel blessed that you had this oportunity to spend quality time with your parents during the last stages of their life. My mom had kidney failure and was on dialysis for some time. She also had dementia and sometimes it was hard to remember when we really lost her. She wasn't really with us in mind and that was very difficult to except as she had been a very vibrant person.
Your father sounds a lot like my dad. He didn't know the meaning of sitting back and relaxing. And, we didn't get to relax around him either. He died of prostate cancer, which is very painful (affects bones). He died in October, but managed to get his garden harvested, canning and freezing vegetables, making pickles etc. My sister and I couldn't understand why this was so important to him, but she has some of her best memories making pickles with him just 1 month before he passed. He built a house 3 years before he died. This was so that they could live close to the hospital where my mother received her dialysis treatments. Previously they lived at a lakehouse 45 min. away from hospitals.
The man was unbelieveable and he will never be forgotten. I'll never forget the day he asked me to come over and he went over his affairs with me as I was his Power of Attorney and Executrix to his estate. I felt such a sense of saddness on that day. We all know we can't have them here forever, so we just have to make the best of things. Enjoy the times you have together. You will be surprised how many things you will remember even years later.
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