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Old 02-09-2007, 12:04 PM   #1
Cat320
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Guys Rule, Finally!

The Guys' Rules*******************


At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down



Finally , the guys' side of the story.

We always hear " the rules"
From the female side.




Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note... these are all numbered "1"
ON PURPOSE!





1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem.

See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 6 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as SEX, CAR S, the shotgun formation,
or BASKETBALL.



1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

 
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Old 02-09-2007, 12:53 PM   #2
exav8tr
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AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 02-09-2007, 01:10 PM   #3
gkbutler
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Boy, did I just get a bunch of dirty looks!!!!!!!!!! Have to say though, that I agree with all of the above stated rules.
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Old 02-09-2007, 01:16 PM   #4
jrgwdenner
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Who ever thought this was cute....or informative....or worthwhile???? LOL!
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Old 02-09-2007, 01:21 PM   #5
Montana Sky
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Old 02-09-2007, 01:28 PM   #6
sreigle
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Amen! We guys just need to do a better job of training....
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Old 02-09-2007, 01:31 PM   #7
David and Jo-Anna
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Bert--since Jo-Anna is an active reader of these posts, of course you don't think I am so stupid as to agree with any of the points set forth in your post. LOL!!!!!!!!!

Besides, I don't recognize 16 colors--6 is enough to cover whatever I have to deal with. LOL!!!!
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Old 02-09-2007, 01:37 PM   #8
Wrenchtraveller
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Hey ,if I followed some of those rules, I don't think I would have stayed married to Donna for 36 years, but they are funny.

When you ask a single guy I know if he is married, he replies, " why should I make one women miserable when I can make a 100 happy."
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Old 02-09-2007, 02:02 PM   #9
Cat320
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Quote:
quote:Originally posted by David and Jo-Anna

Bert--since Jo-Anna is an active reader of these posts, of course you don't think I am so stupid as to agree with any of the points set forth in your post. LOL!!!!!!!!!

Besides, I don't recognize 16 colors--6 is enough to cover whatever I have to deal with. LOL!!!!
Glad you pointed that out, 6 is correct, 16 was a typo...those big numbers confuse me!
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Old 02-09-2007, 02:06 PM   #10
trukdoc
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My favorite ie We do not take hints suptle or otherwise. Want something? SAY IT nicely.
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