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Old 12-01-2007, 07:42 AM   #1
Exnavydiver
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Land O Lakes
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Money talks, chocolate sings

HA HA HA!!!!

The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a
man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his very life into his own
hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's
license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, or significant
other!!

DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?
SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown.
SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
SAFER: What did I do wrong?
SAFEST: Here's fifty dollars.
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: What did you do all day?
SAFER: I hope you didn't overdo it today.
SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe!
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some more chocolate.

13 Things PMS Stands For:
1. Pass My Shotgun
2. Psychotic Mood Shift
3. Perpetual Munching Spree
4. Puffy Mid-Section
5. People Make me Sick
6. Provide Me with Sweets
7. Pardon My Sobbing
8. Pimples May Surface
9. Pass My Sweat pants
10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men Suck
12. Pack My Stuff........And my favorite one...
13. Potential Murder Suspect

Pass this onto all of your hormonal friends and those who might need a
good laugh! Or men who need a warning! And remember: Money talks...but
chocolate sings.

Another thing to giggle about... My husband, not happy with my mood
swings, bought me a mood ring the other day so he would be able to
monitor my moods. When I'm in a good mood, it turns green. When I'm in
a bad mood, it leaves a big red mark on his forehead. Maybe next time
he'll buy me diamonds.
 
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Old 12-01-2007, 10:39 AM   #2
Bradln
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I love it. But you forgot #14 Piss and Moan Syndrome
Ya, I'm in trouble.
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Old 12-01-2007, 12:36 PM   #3
simonsrf
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Location: Pagosa Springs
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I heard it was called PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.
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Old 12-01-2007, 01:51 PM   #4
Parrothead
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That is the nice thing about getting old. Eventually PMS goes away. Of course in its place come bones that ache, eyes that don't function, etc.
Happy trails....................
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Old 12-01-2007, 02:59 PM   #5
Ozzie
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"When I'm in
a bad mood, it leaves a big red mark on his forehead."

...that just killed me...my wife liked it too...
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