Montana Owners Club - Keystone Montana 5th Wheel Forum - View Single Post - Cardinals: not brightest bird in the bottle

radioattic · 04-01-2010, 07:20 AM

With apologies to all you St.Louis fans...

After my second "Cardinals" incident in as many years, I am convinced that, while visually impressive, the Northern Cardinal is utterly stupid. Please let me explain.

Last year, we camped at Paul M. Grist State Park, near Selma, Alabama. This park is remote and beautiful. I counted six camp sites for RVs; we had one, and an absent work crew occupied a second one (we never saw the workers while we were there). At night, the campground staff goes home, and campers are left alone in the middle of 1,400 acres, with no one but the loons on the lake for company. It was almost scary at night, since we were the only two souls in the park.

Comes six AM. Knock-knock-knock! Flutter! Flutter! Squawk! I opened the blinds by the bed slowly to see a very agitated Northern Cardinal, flapping his wings wildly and attacking the window glass mere inches from my formerly-sleeping head. Cardinal had seen his reflection in the glass and took offense at this huge (to him) thing in which a trespasser (himself, backwards) was hiding.

I opened the blinds and shooed him away. Back he came with even more gusto. The bird whacked himself against the glass, HARD, for over 30 minutes before he finally went away. I figured he'd given himself a birdie concussion and flew somewhere to die in private.

Wrong. Comes six AM, next day. Knock-knock-knock! Flutter! Flutter! Squawk! OMG, he's back! Same routine, but thankfully he must have been suffering the effects of the previous day and left after twenty-some-odd minutes. We left that day, and no doubt (if he survived), the little dummy was satisfied and relieved to see his rival had skedaddled. End of first incident.

I recently purchased a "squirrel feeder" to attract my neighborhood squirrels away from the bird feeders. It didn't work as advertised (another story), but it's fun to watch the squirrels stuff themselves into the big glass jar to eat. Birds, also, have discovered this feeder and eat there after the squirrels are full.

We were enjoying lunch outside yesterday and starting to nod off, an after-lunch nap being one of the joys of retirement. Knock-knock-knock! Flutter! Flutter! Squawk! Good grief, what was that?!? I looked up to see a Cardinal in the squirrel feeder, flapping and squawking with even more energy than last year's idiot bird. After watching it for a few seconds, I realized that the bird could not find his way out of the glass jar! And it's a big jar, with an opening large enough for a ham fist. But Cardinal insisted on trying to bully his way out of the BOTTOM of the jar, which, if he hadn't been a bird, he'd have known was impossible.

I walked over to the feeder and gently pulled the jar out of the wooden entryway. Cardinal was neither impressed nor relieved, and kept bashing his little self against the bottom of the jar.

I set the jar on the ground. Knock-knock-knock! Flutter! Flutter! Squawk! He would not turn around and notice freedom just inches away.

I actually had to pick up the jar again, shake it while upside down, and let gravity rescue the bird, still too stupid to rescue himself. He did not come back for the rest of the day. No thank-you note in today's mail.

So I am convinced that the Northern Cardinal, while beautiful, is hopelessly stupid.

04-01-2010, 07:20 AM	#1
radioattic Montana Fan Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Jemison Posts: 121 M.O.C. #9967	Cardinals: not brightest bird in the bottle With apologies to all you St.Louis fans... After my second "Cardinals" incident in as many years, I am convinced that, while visually impressive, the Northern Cardinal is utterly stupid. Please let me explain. Last year, we camped at Paul M. Grist State Park, near Selma, Alabama. This park is remote and beautiful. I counted six camp sites for RVs; we had one, and an absent work crew occupied a second one (we never saw the workers while we were there). At night, the campground staff goes home, and campers are left alone in the middle of 1,400 acres, with no one but the loons on the lake for company. It was almost scary at night, since we were the only two souls in the park. Comes six AM. Knock-knock-knock! Flutter! Flutter! Squawk! I opened the blinds by the bed slowly to see a very agitated Northern Cardinal, flapping his wings wildly and attacking the window glass mere inches from my formerly-sleeping head. Cardinal had seen his reflection in the glass and took offense at this huge (to him) thing in which a trespasser (himself, backwards) was hiding. I opened the blinds and shooed him away. Back he came with even more gusto. The bird whacked himself against the glass, HARD, for over 30 minutes before he finally went away. I figured he'd given himself a birdie concussion and flew somewhere to die in private. Wrong. Comes six AM, next day. Knock-knock-knock! Flutter! Flutter! Squawk! OMG, he's back! Same routine, but thankfully he must have been suffering the effects of the previous day and left after twenty-some-odd minutes. We left that day, and no doubt (if he survived), the little dummy was satisfied and relieved to see his rival had skedaddled. End of first incident. I recently purchased a "squirrel feeder" to attract my neighborhood squirrels away from the bird feeders. It didn't work as advertised (another story), but it's fun to watch the squirrels stuff themselves into the big glass jar to eat. Birds, also, have discovered this feeder and eat there after the squirrels are full. We were enjoying lunch outside yesterday and starting to nod off, an after-lunch nap being one of the joys of retirement. Knock-knock-knock! Flutter! Flutter! Squawk! Good grief, what was that?!? I looked up to see a Cardinal in the squirrel feeder, flapping and squawking with even more energy than last year's idiot bird. After watching it for a few seconds, I realized that the bird could not find his way out of the glass jar! And it's a big jar, with an opening large enough for a ham fist. But Cardinal insisted on trying to bully his way out of the BOTTOM of the jar, which, if he hadn't been a bird, he'd have known was impossible. I walked over to the feeder and gently pulled the jar out of the wooden entryway. Cardinal was neither impressed nor relieved, and kept bashing his little self against the bottom of the jar. I set the jar on the ground. Knock-knock-knock! Flutter! Flutter! Squawk! He would not turn around and notice freedom just inches away. I actually had to pick up the jar again, shake it while upside down, and let gravity rescue the bird, still too stupid to rescue himself. He did not come back for the rest of the day. No thank-you note in today's mail. So I am convinced that the Northern Cardinal, while beautiful, is hopelessly stupid.